Time to let go

I had my suspicions that we weren’t kink-compatible. We tried really hard to find common ground… fucking me from behind in front of a mirror whilst holding my hair… that was good. More than good. It was super hot. I just needed more.

Charlie and I get on like a house on fire. It’s so easy to chat and the same things make us laugh. It feels natural and genuinely fun. I’ve been on enough dates to know that’s fairly rare.

I find him very attractive and hot as fuck. It’s mutual. Before he’s even touched me, my cunt is so very wet in anticipation.

abstract adult art back

“I want to fuck you.”

“That is so hot. I’m not quite ready… but I can think of lots of other things we can do…”

“Like what?”

And then… well… then it gets tricky:

He’s not quite dominant enough to want to take control. He’s not into spanking my clit or anywhere else really. He’s not into eating my cunt. And then punishing me if I’m too noisy. That’s my favourite game (blush). He isn’t really into squeezing my nipples… which is such a shame because it almost makes me cum. 

He would do those things for me because he’s a sweetie, but it wouldn’t be because it drives him crazy. 

And then I feel the tears coming…. because I know it’s not enough and it will never be. And I’m sad because I really like him. I know that I owe it myself now to fulfill my sexual needs and desires with someone who wants nothing more.

For the first time in my life, I’m actually able to articulate all of this right there and then. Naked, we cuddle. We talk. We both come to the same realisation.

It wouldn’t be fair to end things without getting each other off one last time, right? After that we shared wine and a takeaway, some shit 90s music and we laughed and hugged and laughed.

I’m really glad we gave it our best shot.

When we said goodbye later, I was left feeling a tenderness towards Charlie: happy to have a new friend and also a sad because I wished it had worked. Then some frustration on top… that’s another person who’s kinks didn’t fit with mine. Damn it’s hard to find a good match! 

Ruby x

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