As my earlier post reveals, I had 4 dates this weekend just gone, and it was too many. Life felt somewhat out of balance.
The web address of this very page tells you I’m a single mum, so you know that already. This is the first post where I’m going to bring that in: I haven’t mentioned it much yet, because it’s far less sexy!
When I collected my son from school today, I could have wept. In fact I had to really try not to. Holding him in my arms was the most gorgeous thing and my goodness have I missed him recently. Due to various boring arrangements, he’s had two weekends in a row with his dad and I have missed him like never before.
It was only when I was feeling overwhelmed with my sadness at the school gate that it came to me: organising such a full on weekend of back to back dates meant that I didn’t have time to miss him. It was likely some subconscious tactic to forget for a while that I didn’t feel quite whole.
I do often struggle to feel fully integrated regarding parenting and dating: being a mother and being a sexual being can feel like they have to live in separate boxes. I’m hoping this blog can be part of patching those two parts of me together a little. This is one place in the world where I can boldly be both of those things.