I’m feeling a little sorry for myself this evening.
I’m feeling lonely and lamenting how connections built over weeks and months can suddenly disappear. Dating life can feel full and exciting until you look closer and see a handful of shallow connections, easily shattered.
You can spend months messaging someone who is super keen: having met and there being no romantic spark, that’s it, they’re gone. And those cheery “good morning babe” messages have gone too; the early evening “how’s your day?” and the “sleep tight xxx”. I miss those.
Dammit. Maybe I am looking for something a bit more serious than I initially thought. I think I want to feel cared about. That would be so nurturing and lovely.
This feels like a somewhat torturous game, with an end goal of figuring out what I actually want: in dating, in kink, and in life! And then being able to explain that to other people.
I guess I see each date as a step forwards in this journey. There’s something to be learned from each human interaction.
That’s me trying to be all optimistic. Sometimes it just kinda sucks.